Every time you smile I wish for you

 There are so many people we meet during our life. Some that we forget, others we wish to forget but we can't, some that will never leave and others that will, but have such a great impact that will let us with traces of their presence everywhere and forever. And those are the "lost" ones. They wonder through places and time, they are here to live, they are here to watch the nightime sky and see the dances of the billions stars. They are here to make you see in the deepth of your heart and realise how human you are. How weak we are as we crave for affection, for emotions.
There is nothing more poisonous than the human heart. It likes to feel things, it likes to be taken care by someone else and be ripped out of the body, broken and shattered, turned into million pieces and then put back into its vessel, trying to find its place, to recover. But it is a long process. You can easily forgive, but you can't easily forget. That is the hardest part of being human.
And there comes the time when you wish you weren't, when you shout to yourself that you'd better disappear because it is not worth it. But what if it is? What if every thing that happens leads you to where you are supposed to be? Every person you meet, every one you lose, every glass you break, every time you said "Hello" with a smile or every time you said "Goodbye" with tears in your eyes, what if all of these mean something?
There are only a few people who understand that everything and everyone has an ending. That it is the sad truth about the miracles, that they don't last forever. And those people are the happiest, because the stones hanging on their hearts, hoping to relive the same moments, fall into an abyss of self-acceptance. All the tears they shed, leave no mark on their lives. All the times they feared not to break things that are already broken are forgotten. And those are the times when we know we are ready to go to our own path.
"I hate the way she moves around when she doesn't care anymore. It's like the whole world opens to her and I am not allowed through that door. I hate when I know I won't see that smile, but someone else will enjoy it.", he said in a low voice and guilt could be felt in it.
"If we know a person was going to change or leave, we would hold to the memories we had with them even thighter. But we don't. We can't see the moment coming. And when it does we know life is not just an old break-up song, it is an entire symphony."

"But I can feel her presence everywhere. In every person she met, in every corner at the street she passed by, in every stone she touched and I will cherish her until my last day, because she is poison to my world and that is how I want to die."
He knew he couldn't sleep anymore, until the days his bones were completely tired and all the energy he invested in remembering everything was completely gone. And in that day she would come by and press her soul to his chest and he would knew that he would finally wish for her and let go and that moment will live forever.